Apples Rule.

listening to: why did i ever fall in love with you? - dbsk.
reading: hyperbole and a half's blog.
watching: pablo the little red fox; season 1; episode 3 - garbage.
eating: pink lady apple.
drinking: water.




(dedicated to my lovely anon, who wanted me to write more bloggies)

so it's confirmed. i'm a huge nerd. i still watch kids shows, i do my homework in the corner where i can listen to the rain, i still believe in "an apple a day", when attractive english men talk to me i am silent and awkward, i love tinkering away on my piano more than anything, and i still laugh about body functions with my gay best friend.

i don't think we ever really appreciate the little things that make life so much better than it actually is. i can't remember the last time i s-k-i-p-p-e-d some stones by myself, or put glue on my fingers just to peel it off, or bought some cherries and made earrings with them, or sat down and drew with music, or sat out in the rain in silence just to get wet and cold and embrace the fact that there was no other noise but the sky falling. on. my. head.

people always fill the silence with noise; radios, television, friends, talking to themselves, music...

but we never really understand the peacefulness until we break through that awkward 4 second barrier.

i've learnt to appreciate what isn't there.

however there are still things that i wish were more perfect. i don't like the fact that my hair never sits the way i want it, the fact that my clothes don't sit nearly as well on me as they do on the better version of me, the fact that everytime i'm doing exercise, it always hails or rains right as i'm at the furthest point from home, i dislike the fact that there are so many objects in my room that i should just throw out, but can't bear to part with.

i dislike the fact that i feel i've lost a lot of my innocence, and no matter how many awesome tv shows (holla fosters and pablo) i watch, and how many juiceboxes i drink, i can't regain any of it.

but people i know go through that exact same dilemma. people fear change. and i don't blame them. it's a scary thing. but i think sometimes it's for the best. today, i was contemplating something that i often think about in my mind, but have refrained from saying out loud. but he knew what i was thinking. and he said something that i don't think i ever would've expected. "it will always be his loss."

and i think to myself...what a wonderful world.